these rainy days

these rainy days
make me
wonder
about you.

i think about how
sweet
it will be to wake up to your
kisses
your heartbeat
raging against mine
to feel your
marvelous
warm hands
press into my soft skin.

as we lay close in these blankets
i take in lungfuls of your scent
one hand upon your unshaved cheek
one hand intertwined with your fingers
with rings binding us together
forever.

yes.
on these rainy days i
wonder
about you.

all that i know

all that i know
is that you're fine without me
the spark in your eyes
is hollow and empty

so go on,
fill your soul
with dark things
and laughter.

fill out that paper work
for becoming the empty
the doctors will encourage,
say that it's healthy.

& as you fade into the crowd
please remember me
us
we

if it hurts, let it
can't take it?
then fake it.

force a smile when you finally
read the fine print.
& don't forget to blame me
for the things i can't change.

summer has given up

the cold air
presses against my lips
as the wind roars
among the tree tops.

the leaves dance as they
free fall from their everlasting branches
and fade away into the
dark sky.

as my hair is combed
by the cool night air
goosebumps crawl up my spine
and my eyes begin to water.

the smell of this air
the stiffness in my bones
the sound of the cold
summer has given up.

stardust

i want to
fall
into the sky
float on
& sink into the unknown starline.
fade away,
one molecule at a time.
seep into the universe
& inhale the stardust.
i am not of this world
gravity, let it go.
gravity, let me go.

city buzz

it's
morning
and all i want to hear
is the hum of the city.
the
restless and lonely
wandering the concreate
playground
letting their dreams guide
them to their destiny.
yes,
i belong with the helpless
because only fools dream
of flying
instead of
gravity.

friends

i had
forgotten
what it was like
to have music blasting
through the stereo
pumping into my veins
surrounded by
carefree, broken souls
singing with their entire heart.
windows down
wind kissing every single strand
of hair upon my head
i had forgotten
what it was like
to have
friends.

graduation is creeping in

i've decided to
stay
because i want to
listen carefully
&
take seriously
what God has
planned for me.

but
it begins now.
the
wanderlust.

deep inside,
i can feel it.
a silenced
excitement,
like
waiting in the closet
@ a surprise birthday party.

is it my
unsatisfied
sinful
nature?
or is my soul calling for
my distant lover?

i've never been so lost.

but the world is my ispy book
& it's almost time
to seek
& find.